Walk by walks

"General,we have lost contact to team 3,report in,over.."
"We are in position,ready to...*Screaming*"
"General? Team 2 team 2 please response,over."
"*sha*...*sha*.."

Disorganization failure

Lost connection for unclarity causes. Enemy is using unknown weapon damaging our system and causes eardrum explode. Team 2 and Team 3 have been defeated.18 people have been confirmed dead...

Reported by Mr.Fact

Language,connection,link,relationship and self-esteem have been a velum to human in communicating. Ya of course,we are still in contact.but what do we really contact? Body? Spirit? Soul? Or i think the answer probably would be Mouth Communication Interchange(M.C.I). MCI has been using so wildly and it is said to be normal. People is only communicating with using only their mouth. "Cannot mah,how to chat jek? We are not the friend as good as u thought and mostly,we are in wrong channel." Very typical answer. =) Indeed. So what have we seen in our future path? These so called "friends"? Unmoral attitudes?

Admittedly,everyone has their own enemy in their life. Along the path,enemy would be different following our path. The most important thing to defeat "him" is to know him. Realize him,attest to him,face him,take care of him (then use a knife to thrust him!),of course,a joke.. Yea,people has told us this era years ago. To realize him or not? You are the only one can know it. Easy,everyone has their fault,their own enemy. Delay may bring failure,as the soldiers stated above. Unknown brings tragedy. And,what element makes this enemy? Some said it is a psychogenesis,yourself, and may be,other people. All depends on us. Life can be meaningful,don't waste it in depression. May God bless u all,my friends. =)

Storming We3k..

Yea,just like the tree inside the photo,striking storm. Tree will keep on growing tall and taller to get enough sunlight for their food transformation,photosynthesis of course. As things undergo normally,storm is always out of realize-able.. Just like me..

I just do the things,as normal,everything follows the formula. Though,how long did i really filter myself into the formula,which i had forgotten what i should do and also shouldn't do.
Unexpected event has waken me up anyway. I should get rid of that,indeed. It's not a big deal though,but what i can really sure is i have to really think of that,my starting with my ending. Will it be possible a sad ending or something else. Prevention is always better than cure.

Now i standing at there,i should take the rest,and face it without doubt. Faith will carry me on. Yup,i like a girl which i really didn't notice that i like her. So i don't think liking a person is wrong,i do like many people and love my friends. What i gonna do in this case is to admit and keep it well in transparent relationship. Make us friend as possible as i can. Let all things go under nature. Don't think too much and focus on my study.

P/s:When the time will be,it will be. =)

Meaningful Day..

Ah Lim,the only one chinese at there,he is now form 5,God bless him. =)

Kids from there,cute + innocence. =)

On the way to waterfalls!! Siok nia~ haha~

On self-possession.. =)

YoYo~quite like this photo. =) haha..

17 Oct 2009,early in the morning 8.00a.m,my phone's alarm rang,and as usual,i threw my phone away..8.55a.m,Jerry came to my house and ready to fetch me to church to gather. Waliao,i dash to my bathroom as well as packing on my way. How can i do that? I don't know. Human always can do something that is impossible for a 'normal' of you in the urgent situation. Lolz..

After all,we began our footstep to orphanage. I'm the first time to step into there. It's out of my expectation. Anyway,after setting e'thing down,dean told us about the history of this orphanage. In 80-an,he was a civil technician in Johor,he got a high salary job,around Rm8000-Rm9000. One day,he heard that God ask him to leave his job and create this orphanage. By the way,he is a Muslim. His family agreed with that. Then he started his first bible study and training class at there. In 89-an,he was alone to Sungai Petani,he got nothing,no one that can help him,but God. His faith bring him here. Everything God has planned for him. In 90-an,he started this orphanage. Neglected children will be sent here. And three years ago,their orphanage got financial problem,they prayed for it. After 1 week,a guy from Australia phoned him,and asked him *******,is that ur bank account number? He answered 'yes.',and asked who is him? The guy said nothing but just said that he want to donate RM50k money to their orphanage. Until now,they still dunno who is the guy. How well is God helping us. =)

After that,i went around to have a look. Their life is really different from us. For first,of course,they got no parents for them to call "Papa or Mama". *Heart broke* Then their place to sleep and bathroom,place to dry their clothes,playground,toys are all different. Their life is simple. *touching* How blessedness we have. We should appreciate every moment with our parents,appreciate every call "Mum and Dad". Thanks God,i learned much more than a lesson today. =)

Then,it's waterfalls time!!! Wahaha,siok nia. The water is refreshing,my mind,my body,my eyes,my brain,my soul,and my spirit. Darren,Jerry and me lying on the rock where is just nearby the waterfalls(where the water flows very fast),we took a short nap there. Due to we went up to a quite high place,there are few people. Wind blows,leafage flying around,water go through every part of my body,quite and i can even hear water flowing,bird singing. How nice is my feeling after awaken,it did refresh me. Then we played around at there. Just had a nice time at the waterfalls. (p/s:The highlight is while we catch the male frog which is really big and at that time,it was doing "something" to another female frog. LOL..)

Time flied fast,time to go back. Then we went to Sunway to have our dinner. Drank white coffee!! ^^ How nice~ Then we chatting all the way while back.

P/S: Please appreciate every moments we have with our family. =)

Prayer:Lord,i thank to you for bringing us safely all the way and we got parents. May God bless all the children at orphanage there. Especially the kid(i think he is just around 8 years old) who is going to face his operation in the coming Dec. Amen. =)

New Day! New begin! =)

Spider-man,who name himself as well,and people call him as poet-man too. Well,tell honestly and seriously,u just CAN'T imagine how CRAZY he is!

Half an hour before Muet speaking test started. Thanks God! I got the easiest tittle with the best point to talk about. =)

Name: Hunter Xuan
Age: Ancient ages
Details: Appears near around BM,Lower Six Science B.
-Used to hunt for anything.
-Melee type Hunter.
-Damage with using blade.
-Atlante-an man eater.

My new identity,has shown above,Hunter Xuan. Haha,it's just a joke,fun at taking those strange photo anyway. Hmm,This week,i really collapse. I mean,not only physical,but also mental and faith. Ya,i have met some troublesome situation. Now,i think i can really cool down myself and know what had happened to me. Think TOO MUCH! (It doesn't mean what i thought is meaningless,it do remind me and become my lesson.) Yea,that's what i did. I really don't want to accept the fact,anyway,accepted has made me feel better,much much better. Thanks God. I'm fine now. =)

On this Wednesday,it's our Muet Speaking Test day. I didn't feel like nervous at all. Somehow,i did before entering to the exam room. Lol! My sound was shivering as i want to continue my individual presentation. I take 0.32 second to stay cool and continue. Haha,it's so fun to hear that all of the participates speak with their shivering sound,of course included me. In discussion,we have 10 mins to discuss about the most effective way to save our money spending on foodstuff which is increasing nowadays. I'm the only one who can take care of the time(they didn't wear watch!),fine,it's just a raise-hand job. Anyhow,i found it too fake while i gave signal to them that time is almost up. They all suddenly turn to agree me. Believe me,and also believe my eyes,i saw examine was about to laugh but stay steady and he and she (two examiners) laugh after we went out. LOLZ! I was feeling so paiseh. We are not only testing our English,but also our acting skill. Haha.

Then,for the lesson past few weeks and days,i have learned smtg anyway. Thanks God i m awaken. Things must be balanced,abo u will collapse in this world of lie like me. =)

p/s:Sun still shines on me,why should i switch off my light in my room? Just go out to breath and let the sun shine on you. Warm and fresh. How well the creation of God. =) Don't waste your days which can be meaningful and beautiful in depression. Don't lose the chance to enjoy ur life,appreciate the chances and hold it tide,you are the special one and only one. And do believe,anger and depression can be overcome by love and hope. =)

Suffering...

IBM,this is the place where i have started my new life at there. I do believe,for now,i have experienced something different. Recalling my secondary school's life,it's simple and easy. Game + eat + sleep,is there any life can more simple than this? Of course i enjoy it. Time flies so fast that i couldn't even realize time is passing...And it will never return. Some people said that life is easy. How life is that easy? Life is not easy! It's hard,especially if u want to become a Good Man.Of course i m not saying i'm the one,but at least,i m trying my best to.

Now,1a.m,i m still staring on this screen,as tomorrow i got a English Muet speaking test. Recalling,what i have done. How my life goes on... Listening to my breathing,i finally got my time to stay peace. I'm really sorry my friend,being a temper friend,emotional friend... I think i already knew where is problem,but i got to take some time to handle it. For me,now i m really going to become a mad person. Pressure from study,from friends,from situation,from life,from family...The most important is the pressure from myself which i really can't effort it. Demand on myself from me? It's impossible to reach and the worst is i knew what is right and what i should do. I'm so blame full to myself as i m the master of me also. Am i mad? Some answers me is 'Yes,Xuan,u think too much ady.','So i don't have to think? Just ignore those things? I don't want to be a fool.' I answered myself in deep of my mind. Some says 'No,Xuan,u did well somehow,but then u can't change the fact,so that's it.What u can do is to accept it,or else,learn to ignore it.'

Hmm,for now,i believe i m lost. So do i have to think? No matter i know or i don't,what i can do is just ignoring. And the most important thing is,i can't control my emotional while looking at those things. It affected me,very much... I really felt exhausted.I think this is the reason why i get mad nowadays. Apologize to all my friends again here. For next time,i will learn to close my eyes,prevent looking it. It's hard,it's tough,but i will learn,and i must learn! Time to sleep. It's about 1.15am now. Good night my friends.

Prayer: Lord,with your wisdom,help me to solve this situation. And please help all those students who are having Muet Speaking tomorrow and also the day after tomorrow. Amen.

p/s:It's time to slow down my footstep,feel the seconds,i need time. =) Peace~

Haiz's day In IBM

Kok Sheng,the one blackie who stand beside me,has left us to go back to his secondary school to continue his form 6. He is the best basketball player among our friends. We have lost a good player on court. Anyhow,blade doesn't always benefit on one side,he is quite a noob player in DotA,so we have lost a food in gaming. Well,wish u all the best at Perlis there. We'll meet again in GG. =)

At a normal month,a normal week,normal day,in a normal school,with some normal friend... Ya,everything happens just like normal. But it's not for me. In there few days,i really miss my old classmate,they know me the most,they know how am i. Of course not fully understand of me,but we can have joy always,smile together,we can understand,at least,what we r talking. At there,i think i have changed. Changed to a person who doesn't talk always,of course i think it's good,at least not talking bullshit. With this,i have changed from a person who always like to share about my life and talking all over the day to a person who trying to be serious in his study,stop talking bullshit,and as well,my friends around me will not know about me. The situation is,they don't know who am i,i can really joke u know? I can really play madly,but i m just choosing the right time,not like before,playing around the clock. So...what m i facing now is they go out,for example gathering,they won't tell at least i ask. And some activity,even i ask,they won't tell me. At first to IBM,we know each other,well,even just a short time,but we have understood each other much don't we? I thought we have become a "friend".I'm asking a friend who is not only say 'Hi' and 'Bye'. Of course,the thing is not that serious yet,if i take it easy. I care about,that's why i feel upset. Well,i know this will over soon. What i can do is just doing my own job and wait.

Yesterday,went outing with my really friends,they told me not to worry,it's just a period that u can do nothing,but just to wait. Kinda Emo these days,but i feel much better after talking to them,i can feel my shoulder becoming lighter a bit. Thanks my friend who console me. =)

p/s:For friend who is studying in IBM or knows who are they,i don't wanna this to be known by anyone who is included above there. I hope this can really be kept well. Thanks. =)